Sadly, I became aware of a person who has been offended at me this morning. For the rest of this post, I’ll simply refer to this person as ‘this person.’ I wasn’t even aware of it. Since this person left our church, I’ve seen them a couple of times out in public and noticed they were really short with me … like really short. Although I’m sensitive, I’m hard to offend, so when people act that way, I usually ignore it. Now, bear in mind that when this person left our church, they reasoned with me that they needed to attend a church that had a worship experience that was more fitting to their schedule, like on a Saturday night - no problem. This was reality … as I understood it at least.
Today when I saw this person, the short, quick, uninterested communication happened again. The odd thing is that twice in the last couple of weeks, I’ve been led to pray for this person and their family. I followed this person outside and asked them what was wrong. This person told me how I had offended and proceeded to tell me how life had dealt some difficult blows since they left our church. I must say I have to fight frustration at people when they don’t communicate more clearly to me how they feel, especially when you do care about them and their well-being … At any rate, here are a few scriptures to consider that have helped me.
Matthew 18:15-17 “If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back. 16 But if you are unsuccessful, take one or two others with you and go back again, so that everything you say may be confirmed by two or three witnesses. 17 If the person still refuses to listen, take your case to the church. Then if he or she won’t accept the church’s decision, treat that person as a pagan or a corrupt tax collector.
Don’t treat them like a pagan first, try to work it out
Matthew 5:23-24 23So if you are about to place your gift on the altar and remember that someone is angry with you, 24leave your gift there in front of the altar. Make peace with that person, then come back and offer your gift to God.
Everyone involved is responsible to work toward reconciliation when offenses are discovered.
Proverbs 18:19 An offended friend is harder to win back than a fortified city. Arguments separate friends like a gate locked with bars.
The battle for your friendship will be difficult and exhausting. Stay prayed up and commit to a process that may not be quick!
There’s more but the post would be too long and probably offend someone.